I met a girl the other night. A lady. A woman.
It is not all together crazy for me to get to talking with a girl at a party, but the feeling this one left me with is somewhat novel.
I liked her. I liked her a lot.
She was cute, which definitely helps. What drew me in, though, was how she was. What she said, how she behaved. So often it feels like you have to wade through so much superficial muck to get to a point where you can see someone. Truly see them.
I had the somewhat unique feeling of getting to see her. I liked what I saw.
When I first saw her, I was at a table at a bar. The sun was still up, the pleasantly dwindling light of a beautiful Sydney evening. The table was occupied by a bunch of people there for a friends birthday, though I found myself at a table with a bunch of people I wasn’t closely acquainted with.
All the same, the conversation was raucous and fun. I had broached the subject to the table what is the difference between a geek and a nerd, and it sparked lively debate.
Nicola sat next to me. She was a friend of Elly, who I had also met for the first time earlier that night.
Nicola was pretty, but what I remember most clearly is that she had a very disarming smile.
We talked a bit, but to be honest, it hadn’t really entered my head that tonight could be about “meeting someone”. I was mostly focused on catching up with people and having a nice time (both of which I was nailing).
The next I saw of Nicola, she, Elly and I were in the queue for a drink at the next bar, probably an hour and a half later. Elly mentioned that Nicola was training for a world record. I don’t remember specifically what the world record was, but it was something to the effect of doing a repetitive exercise for over 30 hours. Perhaps it was the elliptical machine? Something like that.
Anyways, naturally I was stunned. I enthusiastically congratulated her for going for such a thing. To be honest, it highlighted more than anything else that she was very different to me, so she still wasn’t really on my radar.
The third time I remember hanging out with her on this night was at a little table at this same bar, perhaps an hour later. I was talking to three girls, one of them being Nicola. She sat just to my left.
I don’t remember what we were talking about, but I remember at one point I remember accidentally spilled a drop of my drink on her leg. I apologised, and she just deadpans, “That’s so embarrassing for you. You should kill yourself tomorrow.”
I laughed a little. “I should kill myself for spilling a drop of beer on you?” She shakes her head solemnly. “It was seven litres,” she retorts. I asked her if I could find a way to go back in time and not spill anything on her, would I still have to kill myself? She tells me if I can figure that out then I definitely should go back in time and not do it, but then go back in time again and do it anyways.
It was at this point that she had my full attention.
We had a looonnnggg talk from that point, my eyes never glancing away from hers. We sat in the bar talking bulk bullshit, the kind of banter I utterly crave.
I needed to see, though, was she also capable of deep conversation.
I started to thread in increasingly deep and personal topics, and she never missed a beat. We talked about everything and nothing until the lights came on signalling the bar was about to close. At some point, all of our friends must have left but I didn’t notice.
I remember at this point she was mid-sentence, and as the lights came on she scrunched up her face and said, “no!”
I found it really endearing.
I wasn’t anywhere near done talking to her, so I took her for a walk to the beach. The temperature remained super pleasant though the sun was well and truly set by now. We walked to the beach, continuing to oscillate between banter and genuine conversation.
We sat. She mentioned how she didn’t like PDA, which didn’t really bother me. I really, really liked talking to her. But naturally, we ended up kissing.
Through kisses, she asked me if we could go back to my place.
My place wasn’t really an option, but regardless of if it was, I told her earnestly that I didn’t really want this to be a one night stand. I wanted to take her on a date.
I’ve never actually said this to a girl before, feels like the kind of thing that could be a coin flip – perhaps they like it, perhaps they are completely off put.
She seemed to understand and even agree, though, to my relief.
She asked if we could go somewhere a little more secluded though, and of course I was up for that. We found a little bench, well out of view of prying eyes. There we cuddled, kissed, talked, shared, and did a few things that would definitely be considered indecent in public.
It was really nice, though. I liked it, it felt new. It’s rare for me to be able to bond with someone so well in both humour and genuine connection. Especially on the very first time I have met them. I liked her a lot.
We spent something like 2 hours just on that bench, entangling ourselves in each other. It was all the more flattering because she had something she had to do pretty early in the morning.
Even though it has been a while since I’ve felt something like this, I feel the familiar feeling of getting a little carried away. I find myself wondering if this could be something really good.
I’ve been trying to tell myself that I’ve only met her once. It’s way, way too early to tell if we could be good together. I find myself feeling hopeful, though. Hope makes me feel really good, but it also has a way of blowing up in my face.
Nicola is in Tasmania right now for a holiday. We haven’t been able to have a first date yet. I will message her when she gets back, which is about a week away. A week is kind of a long time, it feels maybe serendipitous that I have been given some time to unthread the expectations that hope lays within me so recklessly.
It is important to take it, and her, for what they are. I had a really, really good time with her one night. It doesn’t deserve any more pressure than that.
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